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1:49 p.m. - May 31, 2007
Super Happy FFA Girl!
Since I went to the ‘city’ high school, we didn’t have a chapter of the FFA. (That’s the Future Farmers of America, for you urbane sophisticates.)

The county schools certainly had them, and the members always wore their cool FFA jackets that were blue and had the school name embroidered on the back.

(Jealous? Yeah…but at least I didn’t have to go out and slog in the fields. So there’s that.)

The FFA was mostly boys but now it’s a pretty mixed group. They are VERY parliamentarian and I guess are strict about using Robert’s Rules of Order in their meetings. That’s probably for the inevitable time when they have to go to the drainage board or county commissioner’s meeting about an issue on the land.

(BTW – who died and left General Robert the be all and end all of rules of order? Is there a Johnson’s Rules of Chaos? Help me, please!)

They also compete in a lot of statewide competitions. Most of them are where they judge soil, livestock, and other items like they are 4-H judges. Yes, I said soil judging. You know – “This dirt is good. Good dirt! This dirt is bad. Bad dirt! Bad! So it is written – so it shall be done.”

They also have “Welding Day”, which I think could be a party and a half. I mean, a bunch of teenagers with arc welders running around! Sounds like fun to me!

The local FFA groups are always good about putting their accomplishments in the newspapers. Of course, there’s not a lot of clamor to cover soil judging, so the FFA groups do it themselves, and the local papers in BFE land, which always need stuff to fill space, gladly put it in.

Again, jealous I am, because there was SQUAT about the Speech Team in the papers. Sigh.

Anyway, it was a lazy day with not a lot going on in the county, and so on page three of the Paper of Montgomery County there was a picture and article about a Southmont FFA team winning a district competition.

It was the Small Engines team. That’s a very useful skill for the farm. Me, I know nothing about engines, and when my lawn mower stops I’m lost except when it needs gas. Otherwise, I just look at it and go “WHY WON’T YOU RUN??? CONSARN MACHINE!”

The team of two had to assemble and start an engine within 75 minutes. I guess that means they have an engine block and nothing else. They had a quiz on safety and operating procedures (given by Stumpy…no, I kid…), participate in five skill stations, use a service manual to determine the specifications for a random engine, and identify 25 engine parts and tools from a list of over 200.

Again, pretty useful I would say, and something I wouldn’t be able to do. A mechanic can tell me my phlange is hyperextended and my semituned whizbang is distended and I’d just say, “Fix the darn thing!” Actually, I do know enough not to get the extra special services they offer at the quick lube place. Otherwise, forget it.

Why am I bringing this up?

One of the team members was a girl.

Imagine, a high school girl that can put together a small engine and identify parts and tools accurately.

You know, I don’t think she’ll have any problems getting dates. There is nothing sexxxxier than a lady with engine grease on her face.

And no one better try the “engine stalled” or “out of gas routine” on her. She’d have it working in no time.

She’s also a renaissance woman, because not only can she build engines, she can grow delicious vegetables as well as design and plant landscapes.

So fellas, tread lightly. She’s super awesome happy FFA girl.


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