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7:22 a.m. - December 05, 2006
Ok, peeps, this is how it has to be. I need to be out of town for a couple of days in Lansing. Now why in the heck Iím going NORTH instead of SOUTH is beyond me. But duty calls, fo sho.

Actually, itíll be an OK, groovy time, but still, it will be chilly.

Anyway, you all need some new content here on Smedís Corner, and if you arenít my MySpace friend, or donít read my MySpace blog (heaven forfend!) then this will be new content. Otherwise, this is leftovers.

Consider it Diaryland rarities Ė you know, the B-Sides and songs given to tribute albums Ė as it were.

And they were edited to conform to my style here. Because, you know, thatís how I roll here.

On with the show!


I just visited the iTunes store and bought tracks by
The Butthole Surfers
The Osmonds
What does that say about me?
Yes, I know, I 'm completely mental, I must say....


Katie has been watching the show "Franklin" on Noggin a lot lately. That's the story of a turtle that has all kinds of friends in the animal kingdom. The normal plot involves Franklin being a dumb-ass kid, and then learning a life lesson with the help of his friends and the other adults around. There's always a life lesson - it's not like they go off and jump off cliffs and chase each other and try to shoot silly wabbits - you know - like in good cartoons.

Anyway, as God as my witness, one of the shows involved a Snail named Snail who dreamed of flying. Franklin dreamed of being an astronaut in the same show. But it was looking bleak for Snail to be able to fly, and Franklin was sad.

He said to his Dad, "If snails can't fly - then maybe turtles can't go to the moon." Well, yeah, he's got a point there.

But Franklin's dad saves the day, and takes Franklin and Snail to the airport where they meet a snail who CAN fly a plane, and she takes Snail up in it and it's a happy ending. The end.


I have some issues:

1. Snail is named Snail. That's like someone being named Human Being. I can just see that. "At 10:38 PM, Human Being was arrested for breaking and entering, possession of a controlled substance, and maintaining a common nuisance."

2. How the **** can you get a turtle in a space suit?

3. How the **** can a snail FLY A PLANE? They have no appendages! I mean, come on! Think about it. I just can't see that globby stuff they have at the bottom of their bodies being able to grasp the controls of even the simplest airplane.

I think too much about this crap.


It doesn't take much for me to become excited.

I reached into my candy jar - the one that contains the Skittles that I put in there for no damn good reason except to rot my teeth and get me fat - and I came out with a handful containing exactly one of each color.

Now that's - that's the perfect Skittles handful.

I'm not going to eat it - no. I'm just going to admire it for a while. Heh.


The other day, we were getting near the end of dinner. Katie had been excused and we were just waiting on Kristin to finish throwing the rest of her dinner on the floor, when Katie, out of the blue, starting playing rock / paper / scissors against herself.

"Rock, Paper, Scissors, Shoot... Rock, Rock."

(Either she got that from Seinfeld or Montessori. The odds are fitty / fitty).

Funny, she always tied herself, too.

This went on for a while and then, well, she started to get creative.

"Rock, Paper, Scissors, Shoot...Sucker, Sucker."

That elicited a huge laugh from Liz and I. So, then Katie went onward.


But the best one was: "Rock, Paper, Scissors, Shoot...Octopus, Octopus."

Liz about fell out of her chair.


Holy Nancy Drew! We have a little mystery here in the Smed hut.
In this spare bedroom, there is a letter puzzle. You know, one that has A to Z in it. This one is in some sort of super cool mad font that's groovy.
Anyway, I was walking up the back (death defying) stairs, and I saw the letter H. My OCD kicked in and I had to put all of the letters back in the puzzle. It turns out that right now, we have five letters missing.
F, R, V, W, and Z.
I looked under the bed here - no dice.
I will scan the house for clues, and I will inform you all of further developments!

*****UPDATE**** We found the ďFĒ and the ďWĒ!!

I'm not going to reveal the screen name (but I sent the link to a couple of people) - however seeing this made me groan and shudder. I could not spell like this on purpose.

About me:
Im a 26 year old single mother of two precious children. I have missed carried four...But they are all in my heart and I love em as much if they were here. Um I go to church mostly evey Sunday...what a difference GOD has made in my life. I have recieved my GED and starting collage in AUG to major in SOCIALOGY.

Who I'd like to meet:
A real true man that is not out to hert or brake my heart. Loving , caring, responciable, loves children cause I have two. That is out searching that speacial person to become life long capanions*.I dont want noone that is out to play head games, so dont evan bother.

So can anyone help me with this dream?
A colleague at work said he would buy my iPod, and I agreed to - but I had to send it back in for a new battery. Now that's a true fact.
But last night I dreamt this - I was in the office on Monday and I ran into my colleague and said that the iPod should arrive next week sometime, and he said that he needed it this week to go to St. Louis, otherwise he wasn't going to buy it.
So I had to make arrangements to send it overnight to Apple and have them overnight one back with a good battery. For that, I went to a local freight company, and tried to get things arranged on their computer, which used an AS/400 and DOS, but I got it done. I was trying to ship it UPS Red, but I finally got the envelope and package ready.
Unfortunately, I left some of the identifying information out of the package so I had to make another package.
Then I missed the UPS pickup there, but I could still make the pickup at their job site. They were also helping build onto this house where a very large family lived - they were helping to build a large addition / sanctuary. The freight companyís remote office was there. I put the package on the desk and made sure the UPS man knew to pick it up.
So, then my sister calls on my cell and says that I need to go to Chicago for work. I decide to fly instead of drive, and find that the only flight for Chicago that's left connects through Buenos Aires and Houston. I tear for the airport, and realize I don't have a passport. I wake up when I'm in the airport, looking for the gate to Buenos Aires.
This raises several questions.
1. The colleague in question travels - but never to St. Louis. He goes to Atlanta, Milwaukee, Chicago, and San Francisco mostly.
2. Why would I go to a freight company to ship this when I could make arrangements at work to send it Fed-Ex or UPS next day quite easily and safely?
3. Why would I go to this house to leave the package, and why is a freight company helping build this house?
4. Why would I FLY to Chicago when I can drive there in 2 1/2 to 3 hours, especially if I avoid 80/94? And why would my SISTER know about my business trips?
5. Why the hell is there no direct flight from Indy to Chicago and why do I have to go through Argentina? And why is there a direct flight from Indy to Buenos Aires.
That there's a puzzler, it is!


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