2:04 p.m. - January 30, 2006
Smed, You Big Dummy....
Idiot.
Dork-o.
Nincompoop.
Moron (or is it Moran?)
Stupidhead.
Eeeediot.
You dumb noodleloaf.
Yep, I called myself all of those names on Sunday.
Why?
Well, I�ll tell you why. (What, I was going to keep it a secret?)
This weekend I had a lot of games to cover, and that means my eating schedule is odd and my eating habits, poor. Totally my fault, I know, but there�s only so much you can get at a high school concession stand. They don�t really have a veggie option, unless the popcorn is cooked in canola oil.
Friday there was a girls / boys varsity doubleheader, so I actually ate my dinner at the concession stand. But I was smart and had water to drink with it.
Saturday I had to cover a boys� game only, but they start the JV early now, and I wasn�t hungry after eating a late lunch, so I just ate there again.
And what did I have to drink with the hot dog and nachos?
Let�s back up a bit. I told you all here that I now am off caffeine.
Admittedly, I�ve slipped a tiny bit. I think about five times in the last three months I actually have drank a regular coke from McDonalds, just because I had a yen for a fountain drink. But they were at lunch and there were no real ill effects of the caffeine, not like when I accidentally drank caffeinated coffee.
And covering a game I had a Dr. Pepper once or twice, but again, nothing that totally affected me adversely.
The concession stand has only Pepsi products, and didn�t have Sierra Mist, so my choices were limited.
I�m a Coke person. I really don�t like Pepsi, so a cola was out.
And I really didn�t want water and had a yen for something sweet.
So I asked for, and received, a Mountain Dew.
Damn, it was sweet, delicious and tasty.
I felt like an addict getting another taste after being off the horse for a while.
But I was a good boy, and only had one. Mind you, it was a 20 oz. bottle of Mountain Dew, but I easily could have asked for two more and chugged them down.
(Sidebar: When I was growing up, we always got returnable Coke bottles, but they were 6 � ounces and I was allowed only one. That was a reasonable size. (Also, when we drank the bottles, we always turned over the bottle to see what bottle plant that bottle originated from � and the farthest away got something or other, like the chance to punch the other kids in the shoulder.))
So, the game ends, and I do my interview and go home to write the story (which is available on the web here in case you care). Liz is watching �Gorky Park� and I thought when she was done with that she�d come upstairs. So I have a glass of wine as well while I try to make sense of what I just saw (not hard, really).
Well, I finish writing the story and the box score and start surfing the web, and I get this uneasy feeling.
Soon, I realize that I�m WIRED up.
I�m way wired. Vooooom!
Liz comes upstairs around 10:30 and asks if I�m coming to bed. I fumble around and tell her that I�m furry (well, I hadn�t shaved and she didn�t like that) and I just wanted to stay up a while.
So she trundles off to bed and I resume surfing. I get another glass of wine, and then I go downstairs to watch something or other off of TiVo.
Then I grab a beer and go upstairs and surf some more and some more and some more.
I think I read everyone on my buddy list, and then stared clicking on others buddy list.
Anyway, about 1:30 I finally try to go to sleep, but it was actually around two that I do get some shuteye.
And of course, Katie is up by 7:30.
I�m too embarrassed to tell Liz what happened, so she thought I was up to nefarious deeds on the net all night.
Finally, after lunch on Sunday, I tell her.
�I drank a Mountain Dew Saturday at the game.�
�OH! So you WERE wired up. I thought you were just telling me something else.�
�No. And that�s the last time I�m going to drink one of those. But, I tell you what�
�What?�
�It was GOOOOOOD�.
But it was still moronical to do such a thing.
Yeah, I know they have Caffeine Free Mountain Dew, but that�s not the same at all. The real stuff, that�s where the action is.
But I now know I can never have one again.
Snif�I guess that�s OK. I�ll live, I�m a big boy.
