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11:15 p.m. - October 29, 2005
Halloween Approacheth!
Ah, soon it will be Halloween.


(I think I saw Lon Chaney dancing with the Queen right there…)

For one, this gives me an excuse to publish this pic:

Now, Halloween is a pretty fun holiday for kids. I know I always had a great time trick-or-treating – getting all the candy and good stuff and thinking up costumes.

Some candy ruled during Halloween. There was one house that always gave out multiple Blow Pops. They’d give you like four or five, including my favorite, Sour Apple. Yum.

Since I don’t like nuts, Milky Way, Nestle Crunch and Krackel were always key as well. Also, they had these candy bars called Marathon bars (remember them??) and those were pretty good if you could score one of them.

Smarties were OK. I, being OCD, would take all of my Smarties and arrange them by color, and eat all of the grape ones last. (Much like my M & M obsession, noted briefly here.)

The holy grail of candy for me was Choco-Lites. Gosh, those were good. They kinda sorta make them still up in Canada, called Aeros. It’s an excuse to get up there. (Hey, I still have a $10 Canadian from my trip to Vancouver. I can put that to use).

Not many people gave lame candy – but there was someone who always gave out Zagnuts from 1966, or these awful things called Buns. Ick. It had nuts and coconut I think. Nasty, nasty, stuff.

As for costumes, I peaked pretty early. In fifth grade, thanks to repeats of “You Bet Your Life” being shown on a local channel, I decided to dress up as Groucho Marx for Halloween.

My mom, believe it or not, went along with it.

I wore a suit – she made me fake eyebrows and moustaches. I had glasses already (for ONCE in my elementary school life my glasses helped me out).

And I was allowed, believe it or not, the piece de resistance.

I got to take a cigar to class. This was fifth grade mind you.

In our school, they had a parade, where all of the classes would go through each room to check out the costumes and the decorations, and then that class would join the parade until you got to sixth grade. Basically, the sixth graders tried to scare the bejeezus out of all the kids. (I mean, the Kindergartners would be in tears, somewhat, but this was the 70’s. Tough it out, kid. Nightmares are for sissies!)

So when the parade came by, I went into full Groucho. The pithy one liners, the eyebrow movement, the stooped posture, I had it all. The kids were a bit flummoxed, but the teachers, they all died laughing. I was a hit.

Remember, I had a cigar as well, a real cigar, one of my Dad’s. In school, in fifth grade, I had a cigar.

It doesn’t get any better than that.

As time went on, I grew out of the costume thing. We didn’t really have many Halloween parties – I always had practice or other things going on. At college, Halloween normally was on a weeknight, and believe it or not we had to actually study during the week. As freshmen, we did go to a Halloween party at the University of Cincinnati during walkout (chosen especially since 19-year olds could drink in Ohio at that time) and I dressed as a construction worker. I had a hard hat and already had the porn-stache, so I did look like one of the Village People. Maybe that’s why I never got a smooch during that party.

Even past college, the Halloween party wasn’t a big thing. Something else was always happening. After Liz and I got together, we did get invited to a costume optional Halloween party one year – and we went as a stereotypical Midwestern suburban couple. We wore polo shirts, khakis and boat shoes. What a stretch, eh? (Half the attendees also chose that costume as well – but hey free booze so no one cared…)

Sure, we gave out candy at our house, tons of it. Everyone who rang the bell got a handful of candy – and not cheap crap either. The good stuff, well, the fun size of the good stuff. But the good stuff nevertheless.

But then, Katie arrived in our life. Halloween became different for us. Daddy and Katie became the trick-or-treat duo.

She was 10 months old for her first Halloween, and Liz made her a kitty cat costume. It was darling, but she cried every time she put on the hood that made her really look like a cat. We went to about four houses trick or treating, and she cried at every one of them.

The next Halloween Liz made her a tiger costume. Raaar! She could imitate a tiger, and that’s what she did – over and over and over again. We went to about ten houses and she never said trick or treat – but always said Raaar!

Last year, Liz didn’t have time to make a costume (this was getting near the end of her employment, and she had it up to her neck in crapola) but we found a neat princess dress for her and she went out as a princess. We hit most of the houses on our street in Zionsville, and Katie was the perfect lady – always with the “Trick or Treat” and always with the “Thank you. Happy Halloween!” at the end.

Now, we’ve moved, and our friends are now scattered all over the town. I’m going to have to make a road map to make sure I hit everyone’s house, plus go around the neighborhood a bit. It may be tricky as well, since I’ll have to carry Kristin around in her costume. But hey, the things you do for Three Musketeers, right?

So, if you see these people coming at you on Halloween:

Don’t worry, it’s just us. And we want candy! (Bomp-ba-bomp-bomp…bomp bomp!)


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