9:00 p.m. - October 28, 2007
THE TRUCK IS COMING MONDAY!
THE FAMILY IS THERE FRIDAY!
Well, I've done a lot of thinking today. When I don't feel well, I do a lot of thinking. OK, a lot more thinking. Once in a while I wish I was vapid. Heh.
Anyway, my thoughts now are about me, and you know what. I'm trying to remember how good I really am, because sometimes you can't through the crap.
I was thinking about some friendships that seem to have been severed - a couple beyond repair it seems - over stupid crap. Well, I call them friendships but mostly it was just stupid internet drama but I had spent time with most of them in a friendly way via phone or in person.
In fact, each and every person has a mix of mine, or two.
But today, I realized that while I can offer to make amends, that's all I can do. And since it's not someone who is in the here and now, I can just offer olive branches - because I have grown and changed over 2007.
The Lord has given me a fresh start and a clean slate that starts, for reals, Saturday when we are all reunited.
And I thank the Lord for that.
And I ask for forgiveness for everything that I have done. I know I'm not perfect and will continue to be inept at times, but I'm trying to learn from my mistakes and issues.
And I wish that anyone involved in stupid internet drama would just, well, realize it's stupid internet drama and not worth your while. Yes, these are your friends, and you do care about them, but who is around you right now, or can be over at your house in an hour if they get their contacts in and a baseball hat on their head?
What you have in the here and now - that's important. Make the best of it. Don't beat yourself up for couldas, shouldas, wouldas out of your control. You can't control anyone elses stuff, just yours.
Do or do not, there is no try.
Some furry sage said that.
I am not that wise. I am just Smed.
And tomorrow, I will rock out more. Good day, one and all.