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1:38 p.m. - December 22, 2005
Christmas Is Coming! Run!
Well, it is getting closer to Christmas here in BFE land.

Our cards are all in the mail (a combination Christmas card and adoption announcement, hand crafted with care by our good friend), the plans have been set for our Christmas Eve brunch with the family, (this is because Niece Nurse has other family obligations that takes them hither and yon for two straight days. I donít pity them, not in the least), our wedding anniversary (which will consist of getting stuff ready from Santa for Katie and Kristin Ė and you know what I NEVER forget my anniversary date) and Christmas Day (after presents, a big pile oínuthiní!)

The snow that fell is starting to evaporate, slowly but surely, except for the hardened crusts at the side of the road.

Itís finally going to warm up to a tolerable temperature, and of course it will then be over freezing so the slush will form, and that means all sorts of slimy things will happen to shoes and clothing as they try to navigate through the slush and the icebergs.

Ah, Christmas slush, my favorite. Itís festive in its many shades and hues: slimy brown, grody black, and unidentifiable shade of ecru.

Of course, Iím feeling the temperature differences in my achy, weary bones. I strained my back playing basketball and today my left shoulder blade feels like thereís an ice pick (or an awl Ė it definitely could be an awl) in it. Now unless someone out there is using voodoo then I must have slept on my shoulder all funny go nuts. The thing that stinks is itís my lower left side of my back that hurts as well.

But donít cry for me Ė thatís what self medication is good for!

Iíve done all of my shopping. Boy let me tell you that was rough, heh! Liz took care of almost everything Ė Iíll get the cliff notes version on a need to know basis so I wonít be surprised when people open the gifts from us. So my job was to get Liz her presents, which I did.

And I just got back from a trip to the Hallmark store for stocking stuffers, an anniversary card and gift bags.

Gift bags, you say? You donít want me wrapping presents. I create shapes and forms heretofore unknown to mankind when I wrap presents.

That trip to the Hallmark store reminded me why I avoid that place except for twice a year. The stench of 124,219 candle varieties is enough to make me hurl. Of course, Liz likes candles so I often think about buying her some, and then Iím sucked into candle world over there and I get overcome with fumes.

I think the candles are worse than getting spritzed in a department store with whatever skanky fragrance they are selling.

(BTW Ė did you realize that skank is not in the spell checker for Word?? It wants to make it skink. Skink??? Sure, you can put in obscure tropical lizards, but not modern slang terms. Now is hoochie in the spell check? Nope. It wants it to be hutchie. I give up.)

And the help at this Hallmark store has a median age of 231, I swear. Itís always busy at the checkout area because it takes these ladies such a long time to swipe the credit cards, and then wrap whatever you have bought (or put it in a box) and then hand it to you. Theyíre Tim Conwayís old man character on the Carol Burnett Show come to life.

But at least Iím avoiding Satanís Discount Store today. I can only imagine what kind of dental-deficient yahoos are in there right now. No, I donít want to imagine them Ė theyíll probably show up in my nightmares.

So now all I need to do is get everything for the brunch (bacon, sausage, eggs, cinnamon rolls, potatoes, juiceÖmmmmÖ), get some Champagne for Saturday night (weíll have some bubbly to celebrate our 11th year as an married couple before we fall asleep out of exhaustion) write my essays for my music postings (I have two Iím going to post in the next few days while Iím out of the office), and call the City Mouse and AJ, among others, email Mac and Moose to thank them for the goodies they sent (and apologize to Mac because I didnít get him anything Ė he sent this out of the blue. Normally, itís just a card from him) and wish them a good holiday!

Oh, yeah, and work for the next four hours.

Well, as much as I normally work.

As you can see, Iím really nose to the grindstone right now.

 

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